The Blank Week

I do not know how else to describe this week but blank.

There is not a single external thing I can do to push this process along.  Sure I can continue to make smart food choices and convince myself drinking water won’t actually kill me.  I can also go to the gym like a good girl.  The problem is none of these things are moving me closer to a surgery date.

The patient advocate at my local clinic has not bothered to call–not that I am surprised.

Last Thursday, I made an appointment for Monday, June 17 with my primary to let him know I have gotten precisely no where–okay, not no where but it feels like it.  I also need to know if he has the four months of diet failure in my chart.  We have been talking about it for over a year but I just do not know how he’s charted it.

On Wednesday, June 19 my husband and I are attending the weight loss surgery seminar given by the clinic that won’t call me back.  It feels sort of empty and hopeless but on the off chance they will agree to the surgery, I have to take the class.

The good news is I am wearing a top I bought last year and it’s hanging off my neck and shoulders.  I have not taken my measurements–I keep forgetting–but I feel like I might be firming up just a bit.  If it is a non-scale-victory, NSV, I will take it!

Blank.

I feel blank.  UGH!

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