My biggest rule is the 24 hour rule. If I have one of those days like yesterday, I give myself 24 hours to throw my fit AND move on.
Moving on is not forgetting about what got under my skin in the first place.
Moving on is knowing I am not going to solve it in one day so I might as well let it simmer and find something interesting and uplifting to do with my time.
Trust me, my head and heart are still working on not comparing my journey to someone else’s to the point I lose sight of remembering just how hard my own road is. Since I have lived in this body my whole life, I respect myself enough to know I have a lot of work to do to “fix” this.
Fibromyalgia does not give me enough extra energy to spend wound up for days or even weeks on a yet-to-be-solved problem. Most days I get 3-5 good hours so instead of filling them by comparing myself to everyone who I decide has it “better” than me, I give myself a reason, or many reasons, to win.
Whatever I want?
Feeling inadequate has one cure and it is not feeling that way. One of the best ways to not feel that way, is to do something which makes you feel successful, strong, smart, and sassy.
By creating opportunities to feel victory, the negative is pushed to the sidelines.
My body is whack. It’s so true it has become a law.
I know from experience if I starve myself and exercise hours a day it still is not going to cooperate. From time to time, this knowledge is going to make me a crying, snarling mess. I am a lot closer to not becoming that person ever again than at any time before in my life so I know I am making progress.
Progress is good.
Last night before I went to bed, the last thing I listened to was one of my personal pep talks. It is an actual pep talk from the movie “Any Given Sunday.” Al Pacino plays Tony D’Amato, the head coach of an arena football team. He tells the players before the big game the difference between winning and losing is being willing to fight.
“The inches we need are everywhere around us…Life’s this game of inches, so is football.”
Last night I added, “Weight loss is a game of inches. Play to win.”
The coach is right success is often determined by the soul of the one seeking it.
My soul does not have time to get mired down by someone else’s accomplishments because when I let it I am doing little more than watching from the nosebleed section.
I prefer the field with grass stains on my uniform.
Twenty-four hours ago I was hurting and I decided to stop, to get back in the game, and find just one more inch.
This is what my day looked like according to my BodyBugg.
Each spike on that graph was me moving. The numbers on the side indicate the number of calories I burned each minute I was active.
The tiny spikes mid-morning are me editing my book. Book editing burns 1.4 calories a minute which is slightly more than if I was doing nothing at all.
The taller spikes in the afternoon were everything from driving to helping load firewood on the truck for a delivery–I can lift a one pound stick of firewood with little consequence to my body but if I do that 15 times in a row my body pays attention. At 10 calories a minute, I feel those spikes but I also need them to win the game.
The medium spikes were cooking dinner and hand washing dishes.
Everything I do pushes me closer to my goal.
Twenty-four hours ago I was all sorts of upset. Right now I feel pretty badass…and exhausted…the good kind. I will take days like today over days like yesterday.
I have not solved a thing. But, I feel better. When I feel better, I do better. I am never more than 24-hours away from feeling better.