First Week–Ring In The New, Remember The Old

It has been a pain-filled week.  Weeks like this make losing weight with fibromyalgia even harder…not impossible…just harder.

I did lose two pounds.

I did NOT exercise (what you would think of as “exercise” anyway) for even five minutes all week.

I do stretch multiple times a day.  Plus several years ago I started building movement into my normal routine.  If able, I park a few extra spaces from the door.  I make sure and move every hour or, at most, every two hours.  I look for opportunities to get an extra step or two every chance I get.

As for food, my man and I are having a struggle.  He’s normally a SAINT but this week he’s been trying to feed me carbs when he knows it’s low carb day and tempting me with Cherry Coke (my favorite Reward Day beverage).  We even had a little tiff about it.  We rarely have tiffs about anything.

Lesson: Your support system is going to fail you at times so decide now what you are going to do when it does.

Between you and me, he’s off the healthy eating track and instead of doing something about it there seems to be an effort to pull me off.  I confronted him about it and he says that’s not the case but garlic bread and Cherry Coke are louder.  He says he supports me.  And he does.  He says I am happier when I’m Carb Cycling.  And I am.  But, when the garlic bread comes with, “I know it’s low carb day but…” then there’s more going on than he is admitting.  Because I am aware of it I can almost not take it personally.

However, there’s another thing I needed to be on guard about.  The more he tried convincing me that I “needed” those carbs–no human ever “needs” soda–the more I could feel myself wanting to restrict them even further.  It’s an old, super old behavior that hasn’t been an issue in my life for so long I cannot even remember the last time other than to say my teenage years.

Lesson: Everything you think you have conquered will show up again.  You can either see it as an excuse or a moment to shine.  It is up to you to decide which it’s going to be….and if you pick excuse then hold yourself accountable and pull yourself back on track. 

In my family food was used as a means of control.  I once changed my mind about pancakes but since they were already made I was forced to sit at the table until I ate them.  I ended up sleeping there.  I did not eat the pancakes.  There was also the ever popular, “If you do something good, you can have (junk food).”  But by far the one I fought against the most was, “There are starving children in China” argument.  Even as a pre-teen and teen I could clearly recognize food as a weapon.  It is what lead me to disordered eating and trying so desperately to be an anorexic (weak gag reflex but I exercised up to five hours a day to compensate).

All of that control, all of that battle mentality rushed back the more my husband tried to feed food I do eat but never on LC day.  However, as I recognized the rush of memory and remembered where I had been and how when I started this journey 12 years ago I vowed I would never resort to extreme tactics or to weaponize food; I could find a sense of calm.

That Cherry Coke has been waiting in the refrigerator since Wednesday.  It’s Reward Day today and I’ll drink it when I am ready to enjoy it.

Lesson: No matter if you use Carb Cycling or not, build moments into your plan when you are allowed a little something sweet or special.  For YEARS I thought this was a lame excuse by food addicts to cheat.  The truth is Carb Cycling a la Chris Powell has taught me for my wonky Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis metabolism Reward Day is CRUCIAL to keep my body from shutting my weight loss efforts down. 

Aside from that my food hasn’t been great this week.  I had one day where I had three protein bars to avoid eating “bad” food and because I ended up extremely busy and unprepared.  Three protein bars are always better than junk food.  But having a day that caused three protein bars is a signal my life was off-balance and that’s not good.  Honestly, pain and her accompanying sleep issues were part of the equation.  I woke up late: protein bar.  My schedule backed up: protein bar.  I needed something healthy but not filling: protein bar (but had I eaten normally during the day I wouldn’t have felt the need).

The best thing about my week: finding unsweetened, flavored seltzer water.  I have been drinking one, 1-liter bottle a day.  I HATE water.  Light bubbles and a hint of flavor make all the difference in the world.

Lesson: No matter how much you think the week has sucked find just one thing to pat yourself on the back about.  Losing weight with fibromyalgia and thyroid disease (or whatever you are dealing with) is hard enough.  Find that one thing and congratulate yourself for getting it right.  You do not need to be perfect to lose weight.  Just incredibly honest.

Here’s my best advice when fibro is kicking your butt, your support system isn’t playing nicely, old bad habits rear their ugly head, and when you just feel like you can’t do it:

Eat Like You Love Yourself

 

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