My morning started in earnest at the bright, but cloudy, glorious, but not, 6:54 a.m. hour. It had only been about 22 minutes since I swallowed my thyroid medication so eating breakfast would have to wait another 38 minutes. So I swapped my cute coffee mug for my personal blender bottle and I was out the door in less than 10 minutes.
Where was I going at such an hour?
To help my hubster.
Honest to protein bar, he’s the only thing that can drag me out of the house at that time of day…and my surgery, of course. We’re talking serious upper-level importance or I am content to slowly, very slowly, come to life.
After travel-izing my coffee, I grabbed what I thought was a Quest Bar, dropped it in my purse, and gingerly walked down the wet stairs to my car. I was following his truck because after we were done he had to head to work and I had a pile of honey-dos.
Much to my dismay when the 38 minutes expired I rooted around in my purse for a few nibbles of breakfast. My purse is evil as hell so the rooting meant unloading half of it looking for the bar.
No Quest Bar.
I may have sworn. Okay, I did swear.
Instead of the lovely Banana Nut bar I had a non-high-quality-but-on-sale-for-50-cents-each Nature Valley protein bar. I also had a Cappuccino Nectar single serve but I’d already slurped all my coffee and no water so that was out.
Tanya’s Rule One: ALWAYS have a variety of protein in your purse, camera bag, briefcase, tote or whatever just do not leave home without protein. Period.
I only bought the 50-cent bars as an emergency stash and because they were on sale for 50-cents. Hey, sometimes the budget wins. As long as I balance my day like I’m supposed to one ‘cheap’ bar once in a while isn’t going to break the protein bank. And they have decidedly less sodium than fast food and most convenience store offerings. Plus they are so much easier to eat than trying to pick the meat out of fast food breakfast offerings at 75-mph.
I noshed half the bar while I was waiting for hubs to catch up with me. I don’t know how I managed it but I beat him to our storage shed. Maybe I was going a little faster than 75 miles per hour. Whatever. As soon as he pulled in behind me, I carefully folded the wrapper over the rest of the bar and stuck it back in the hellish purse while knowing I’d cuss again later when I couldn’t find it. Seriously, my purse sucks.
Hubs only needed my help for an little over an hour but despite the unseasonably cool, wet air I had actual sweat running down my back. Eww and TMI, I know, but I want you to really understand how I make this all work–juggling medication that has to be taken on an empty stomach, eating protein without resorting to junk, having a life, having good hair, and best of all being a true help-mate and companion to the most adorable man on Earth while still sneaking in time to do my own thangs like writing these notes to you.
As he slipped me $20 for gas to complete said honey-dos I had a choice:
Cool liquids or ‘real’ protein.
My sweat picked liquids.
At that point I was thirsty and as you probably know being thirsty after weight loss surgery is a sign you are already depleted. Protein could wait until I made it home. If it couldn’t, I always knew I could pull over to the side of the road to empty the purse from hell in search of the half-eaten bar. But you and I both know that unless symptoms of hypoglycemia started coming on the contents of that most-hated handbag were safe.
Can I just pause to tell you how much I am in love with Bai antioxidant waters. OMGOSH!!! Clean, fresh, and no chemical sweeteners. Plus the flavors are seriously worthy of YUM!!! I grabbed the Brasilla Blueberry, filled the tank, stretched at the gas pump (Oh yes, I did and I didn’t give one single fig that the parking lot was full of construction workers ready to start their days), rolled all the windows down and sipped my way home.
From our storage shed to home is about 30 minutes. As I was walking up the soggy steps, only a couple of ounces remained. When they were slurped, I made my way down the hall to pick clothes for the day.
“Humm, business meeting with hubs later…a trip up the canyon to check on one of the stores…grocery shopping on the way home…wait, screw grocery shopping…there’s leftovers…I have nothing to wear…”
There are over 65 hangers on my side of the closet but I’m at that stage where my pre-surgery clothes are looking clown-ish and my small stash of smaller clothes aren’t quite right but getting righter by the day so that I was starting the “I have nothing to wear” tantrum tipped me off to one very important thing.
I. AM. HUNGRY!
Okay maybe ‘hungry’ in the wrong word but I definitely was past time to eat.
Honestly on the way to hangry and irrational.
I made three trips from my closet to the refrigerator, “Nothing to eat.”
That there is ‘nothing’ for me to eat is not quite as untrue as the ‘nothing’ to wear. I need to shop but there is food. Good food.
So I took a big deep breath and reminded myself my want to eat has passed and I’ve let myself get to the need to eat stage. There’s a difference.
“Just eat half a Quest Bar and chill the hell out woman!”
Yes, I said it out loud.
Because, sometimes I have to get that tough on myself. I have to hear it.
So I noshed the Banana Nut while I started this post to help me from chomping through it too fast. Distraction is a necessary tool for me when I let myself reach this stage. Otherwise I can plan on the next several hours dealing with a sad tummy. Did I mention I have things to do today? I do not have time for a sad tummy.
It doesn’t matter one single bit that I do not want to hold still and babysit my belly.
Or that the former me might decide to skip breakfast altogether in the name of “Stuff to do” even though the truth would be skipping meals is just a form of self-punishment or abuse, and can inspire disordered eating.
Today I have a sleeve. Sleeves need food on a fairly predictable schedule. They need high protein of good quality along with fiber and plenty of water.
Today I know I have to love my sleeve, myself and my body if I want to stay happy and healthy.
I ate the other half of the bar after I showered and while waiting for my trusty t-shirt to extract most of the water out of my curls before blowing them to smithereens since, thanks to my hangry moment, I was now out of time to let them dry naturally.
And then I was able to get to the rest of my day which included choosing to not have the most glorious sweet potato fries in the whole world when we stopped at one of my favorite cafes for lunch.
Sweet potato fries, no matter their glory, are actually worse than letting my day spiral to the point I have to ‘force’ to eat. Glad I was not hangry because I might not be quite so rational.
And, this my friends is how you get through a real life post-op day.
Weight loss surgery success is all about navigating your life within the requirements of your new tummy.
Choices. Always, always, always making your choices and holding yourself accountable for them.
So far days like these and making these choices have yielded weight loss totaling 35 pounds in seven weeks.