Week Two: Ugh!


Just ugh!

But allow me to likely ramble while I elaborate.

Do you remember the pain I talked about last week?  Wellllllllllll it turns out that pain was something.

Oh make no mistake fibromyalgia pain IS something but last week’s pain wasn’t the fibro pain I’m used to.

Fortunately, three weeks ago I had scheduled a check-in appointment with my doctor.  Then on the day of the appointment something more urgent came up.

Isn’t it always the way?

The next morning I headed straight for the nurse practitioner’s office in another city and part of the group of doctors I see.  He always have open appointments.  I was seen in less than an hour after my phone call.

The diagnosis:

Cervical Ridiculopathy.


(Yeah, the irony that those two words contain many of same letters is not lost on me.  Not one effing bit).

Now before I dive off into much more of an explanation of this particular pain I am going to stop myself and say simply I left with orders for an MRI with the potential of surgery looming.

That much pain!

I spent the next day and a half pouting.

I usually only allow myself one day but under the circumstances I needed a little more time to work through it.

What has this done to my efforts to lose weight?

Upset them of course!!!!!!!!

Fibromyalgia and Hashimoto’s have taught me to march through a lot of pain and dysfunction but yet another new issue which may have life-long consequences?

“C’mon body, work with me dammit!”


I was frustrated and not at all totally on plan.

My food was okay.

On my day and a half of pouting, I did “need” a bag of Skittles.

I wanted fruity, sweet.

I wanted to feel better.

The first 8, 10, 12 Skittles were exactly what I was hoping for.  The rest of the bag honestly tasted like shit.  All the flavors blended together.  The waxy, polished shell was annoying and gross.  And, they failed to satisfy.

However, all the parts of my brain which light up in the presence of sugar were awake for the first time in days.Sugar brain scan

As a drug, Skittles gave me what I was hoping for.

I rarely resort to sugar but….and maybe this is going to be too much TMI for many of you…but when amazing sex isn’t enough of a rush it’s time to bring out sugar.

Yep, sex more than sugar is one of my pain coping mechanisms.

This time it failed.

Ironically even though it was completely a lovely union, when it failed to pull me out of the pain-pit it was a perfect sign something more than just fibro was going on.

When I send fibro pain a rush of intimacy-fueled endorphins, she says, “Thank You Nice Lady,” and calms down at least for a little while.  This time.  Nada.  Okay, not true but only maybe 15-20 minutes of post-coital bliss.

What has pain done to my commitment to move?

Honestly, not much.

Am I doing much with my upper body?  Uhh, that’s a big, fat NO!!!!!!!

But am I still moving?  Yep.  Even on my days when I was “resting” I was still getting up every 60-90 minutes.

How’s the scale look?


Not weight gain, bloated.  Water retention, bloated.

One of the things chronic pain has taught me is just how much our muscles rely on water to process pain and in this case injury.  Any pain event causes the scale to jump not because I’m being ‘bad’ and not doing the things I need to but because my body is in recovery mode.

As much as I know this, it’s soul sucking to see the scale and my body puff-up.

However this experience reinforces my message that when you are trying to lose weight with fibro, thyroid disease, or even your run of the mill ridiculous, ridiculopathy you have to keep you head on straight.  You have to know in advance what you are going to do and more importantly NOT do when pain hits you.

My best advice:  If you can conquer the mental part of the game and only use food as a tool–even a little sugar–to vault you from where you are to where you need to be, when you body is back to behaving you won’t have to battle extra and real weight gain.

WP_20150108_001My best, BEST advice: DRINK WATER!!!!!!!  If you’re a water-hater like me figure out what you need to do to DRINK WATER anyway.  My new favorite is no sugar, no artificial sugar, lightly flavored seltzer water.  Flavor it!  Infuse it!  Drink mix it!  JUST DRINK IT!

I also love that the name of the store brand is “Super Chill” because I have been needing to do a super lot of chilling this week.

In a weird way my new water find has been a comforting reminder this pain is going to pass.  It might be a speed bump now but it is going to get better.  If I keep my head, it won’t throw me off track too much.

Keep Calm…and move on…even if you need to ugh, ugh, ugh along the way.





6 thoughts on “Week Two: Ugh!

  1. You know I am fused from C-3 to C-7? Titanium, in 2000. I went from almost zero range of motion and rotation in ny left arm to today 15 yrs later still doing well. But there’s still the arthritis and stenosis that creates havoc at times and my spine is wearing out above and below my fusion.
    All that said it’s been the one radical surgery I am grateful for having had.

    • I had no idea! A car accident messed up my neck about 15 years ago but I think this is lower than that. I just cannot bring myself to do sifting through my medical records to find out for sure. Ya know, I like it when we Echo the good things, these not so good ones…well it’s nice to know I have a sister out there but I do wish neither one of us had to deal with any of this.

  2. Darn phone sorry.
    I think you’re so brilliant at advocating and educating yourself that you’ll know what’s right for you.
    Please keep me posted how you’re doing and if you need to chat you have my number. All of them.. lol.
    Love you sweetie

  3. Those curve balls just keep coming and we just keep catching them! Has this past week just been the week for yet another thing to pile on? Me with holes in my stomach and you with this ridiculous new curve ball.
    I know that we’ll both get through this. You with more grace than I will. You only took a day and a half. I took a bit longer. Today, out with my daughters, I found myself fighting back frustration. I didn’t want pain to ruin the day. I was able to keep it in check but just barely. Now I am exhausted and wondering how many days it will take me to recover from my outing. I wasn’t 80% when I went but we have to go out and live.
    I am a water drinker. I always have a bottle of water in my hand. I had to train myself to like it but now I panic a little when I set my bottle down and forget where I left it! It really is the most effective remedy for bloat but I swear, I pee more than a pregnant woman!
    So here we both go…..off to slay another dragon! Just remember that your track record for conquering your body’s issues is 100%. This will be no different.

    • I know you’ll get through it too. I added turmeric to my blueberry, carrot juice, coconut milk smoothie yesterday. Normally, this is my go to combo. The turmeric made it look and taste like MUD!!! *Shudders* But every time I took a drink I just kept repeating, “Food not pharma!” I think I’ll work on other ways to add tumeric though…lol…MUD I tell ya!!!

      As for your outing, oh girl do I EVER understand. Forcing myself out like that is what helped me get where I am now. It’s like it trained my body to not freak out as much, for as long, and with such force. Once in a while, I’ll still have a bad result but it’s not as often. I hope you feel better. Your story about the teddy bear sounded absolutely adorable. I’m glad you went so you could share it 🙂 Feel better dear one!

      PS…Water’s great when it tastes like coffee….hahahahahahahaha

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